Under the chapter of Committed Romantic Relationships are Dimensions of Romantic Relationships. It claims that researchers have struggled to define romantic commitment, but the truth is I don't know how anyone can accurately define it, considering humans are all different and unique in their own way. The textbook believes romantic love consists of three dimensions: intimacy, commitment and passion. Although these dimensions are different, the book claims they can overlap and interact throughout your lifetime, which I would agree with as well. Before I read the chapter I assumed romantic relationships, were much like close friendships but also including intimacy and monogamy.
Me and Drew, Santa Monica
- Passion: Is described in the book as intensely positive feelings and fervent desire for another person. I would describe it as the 'crazy about you' type feeling, that you get with a person, to the extent that you could not fathom to think about your life without them.
- Commitment: Is the intention to remain involved in the relationship. I also view this concept as a very strict agreement, with commitment comes a great deal of respect and trust.
- Intimacy: Are the feelings of closeness, connection and tenderness. I think most people would assume this simply means sex and/or lust.
I chose this clip narrated by Eckhart Tolle, not only because Professor Mary Fong raves about his book, "The Power of Now," but because the dimensions of romantic relationships and the being of humans are very complex and Tolle seems to get a good grasp on the meaning. No one person is alike, and in order to achieve an understanding of another is really an incredible things. There is a sense of passion and mystery in this video, and requires the brain to really think of how love can overpower a person in negative or positive ways, in which we surprise ourselves or feel a sense of power.
I like that you demonstrated the various dimensions of dialectical relationship by sharing positive examples from your personal experience and showing this clip that explains the more difficult aspects of relationships. The clip discussed how it is easier to pinpoint your partners flaws than to accurately examine your own. If you are in a healthy relationship, like the one you are in with Drew, do you still find this to be an issue in your relationship?
ReplyDeleteYes, I think when you spend a lot of time with another person, it could be any person, you will find flaws in everyone. Not necessarily major flaws but also the slightest flaws as well. He is very intelligent, yet does not think "white privilege" exist, and it really annoys me that he is oblivious, when we are out together and I am treated differently than he is. I wish he could see the world through my eyes. Also he can't just have one beer on a saturday afternoon, if he has one he'll have two then three and sometimes falls asleep on the couch (sign of alcoholism) I know. In reality I know he is not a drunk just simply want to let go after a long week in the office, but I see it as a flaw and potentially a sign of a later problem. Do you see flaws in anyone you think highly of or have a perfect relationship with?
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